No Small Thing

 As seems to be a pattern from previous visits, these last days here I find myself ‘gathering and sorting’.

Thoughts. Feelings. Hopes. Expectations. Reflections. Observations.

It’s all part of an intentionality I have found to be so helpful in the ongoing discernment process of hearing God’s voice and direction for the love-work He’s invited me into here. To stop and do this.

It happens quite easily as I download my pictures.

It’s been a full two weeks, with Ken’s presence and the celebration of our 45th anniversary included, so there’s lots to gather, lots to sort through. The whole of the processing, like the pictures, will take weeks if not longer, and so in these quieter (for now) Saturday morning moments, I make no attempt to make any sure statements. Not even to summarize. Not yet.

But one thing seems repeated. This time, and perhaps every time.

There is no such thing as a small thing in God’s hands.

Apparently, I like to take pictures of flowers when I’m here, something a real photographer (Evangeline Wilton) pointed out to me when we were here together a few years back.

It’s true. In particular, I like to try to capture the very small blooms. Bring them forward into focus. Let them be seen and admired even though they might be overlooked if you were just walking by and didn’t stop to get a closer look.

I was doing this on our second visit to the other property, yesterday. While Ken and Suradet and our male staff A-nu paced out and measured for potential new dorms and kitchens and bathrooms and such, I traipsed about capturing small things.

I think long ago I abandoned the very wrong notion that success was measured in size. I rejoice with my brothers and sisters in ministry when they report huge numbers in Bibles delivered, churches planted, congregational attendance, healings and baptisms. Of course I do, who wouldn’t?

But these things no longer motivate me to emulate them.

Because God is also in the small. And so many of us serve in the small ways that never earn much attention, if that's what we wanted. No interview or article or any notice whatsoever, really. Honestly, the world could well walk by and never even know we were here. And that’s good and that’s true and that’s also how God works.

The wise words from a director of a local charity in KW (Jon Hill of Ray of Hope) once told a group of us that you can do one thing for a lot of people or do a lot of things for a few people, and it was good to know which thing you were going to aim for.

Twenty-one. Right now that’s how many delicate, miniscule little souls God has asked us to care for. And each one is an individual in their own right. A uniquely essential human being God has placed on this planet for His own plans and purposes. And for some incredible reason, He has seen fit to have us come alongside them and support their growing as they become all they were created to be.

One at a time. Small but not small. Not at all.

Now, for clarification. New Family Foundations does want you to know we are here. We need you. You are an essential part in making this smal- not-small beautiful thing happen for these kids.

And, the part about buildings for the new property? Well, consider that a behind the scenes sneak peak into some of what we are trying to prepare for, as God provides and leads.

Which is really what I’m gathering and sorting in these last days before heading back….I was going to say ‘home’ but…..it seems I have a few of those.

Photo Cred: Still life, me. Children Ahahn Gow Sman (with thanks).

Heroes and Hearing Aids

 

Mapping out a possible site plan for our next property.

Suradet arrives at the door to the guest house and, speaking Thai, lets us know that our breakfast is on the table. I get up to get ready and Ken gives me that look. Oh, right. He doesn’t know what was said. “That’s the call to breakfast”, I tell him.

That’s a small one.

Offertory is done on Sunday morning and, speaking Thai into the mic, Suradet invites Ken to pray over what has been gathered. I turn to Ken and translate, but Ken still can’t quite hear me above the noise of the fan. He decides to just go with a good guess, and goes up to the platform and prays.

That’s a bigger one.

And it’s happening all the time.

Pacing out possible grading requirements.

Whenever you take on a cross cultural adventure you know you’re going to run into communication risks. It’s just the nature of the game. I’ve written my fair share of anecdotal posts recounting my many mistakes and misses, some hilarious (Where is my poo?), others somewhat unfortunate (When I thought someone called me fat just before I got up to preach and I let it be a distraction). I am trying to learn not just the language but also the cultural nuances of communicating important ideas, concepts and feelings in Thai. It’s hard.

But for Ken there is an additional factor.

Half the time, he can’t hear what’s being said even in English. A familial hearing loss reality makes navigating conversations and relationships that much more of a thing. He wears hearing aids now in both ears, and is pretty much legally deaf without them. Even in our regular lives, in English and with me raising my volume most of the time, this is something we are always dealing with.

And then we fly half way around the world to where quiet-spoken people speak an entirely strange language.

I hadn’t really noticed this in his previous two visits, even though I’m sure it was there. Either way, this time I am rather impressed with the character and patience it takes for him to be here with this specific difference in ability. The sense that you are always just one step behind, that everyone else seems to know what’s going on, or what’s so funny, and you’re the odd one out - that’s hard on anyone’s self esteem. We’ve all been there from time to time. But if it’s a constant, underlying factor in the overall experience, that’s wearing.

To put it simply, it makes you feel stupid. And not very many of us can stand up against that and stay true to ourselves after days and days of it. Those who can are to be commended.

Some heroes wear hearing aids. I happened to have snagged one for a husband. And in this trip particularly, I so admire his patience, his willingness to go with the flow and wait until he has more context, his graciousness with non-English speakers (not always something foreigners – and dare I say it, white Boomer males – are known for here), and his enviable ability to not take himself too seriously.

Cross cultural communication is a huge dynamic in building the kind of relationships we are committed to at New Family Foundation. As Highview’s Missionary in Residence, I will continue to lead into reciprocity and respect in every way possible. Although I confess that I struggle, I will continue to press myself to learn the language and the culture, even though mistakes will undoubtedly continue to be made, and often as not I feel foolish.

And I am glad to keep learning from Ken too.

He is, after all, my hero on so many levels.

Small World, Big Difference

Only time for a quick post this morning.

We are between having had a very brief visit with Esther, and a day trip up the mountain to Doi Intanon.

 About Esther.

How cool is it when someone you’ve literally watched grow up in your church family in KW, meets you at Hot Springs near Chiang Mai because she is between ministries in Phuket and Chiang Rai?  There’s just so much wow-ness in that one sentence. 

Many of you would know that Esther Weatherall (link here) is here in Thailand for a year plus, working with For Freedom International (link here?) and their ministry with individuals involved in human trafficking.  I’ll let you go to the links to get the full impact of what that means.  For now I’ll just say that it was a gift for Ken and I to be able to spend yesterday afternoon and evening together with you Esther, having som tum with the kids and Ahjahn Gaow, and having you both lead us in our evening time of worship.  Godspeed for what’s ahead.

 About Doi Intanon.

A day trip that we anticipate will be a breath of fresh mountain air, with accompanying vistas, and the beauty of the Royal Gardens that are there.  Consider this a similar excursion as when we might take Suradet and Yupa to Niagara Falls.  An anniversary treat we just couldn’t get at home.  Pictures to follow.

Wishing everyone a fabulous first day in August!

In Pursuit of Joy

 

Not on purpose, but the verse I chose for our Fruit of the Spirit lesson on Joy fits well with the reason Ken and I are here together this time.

Nehemiah 8:9-10

“Then Nehemiah the governor, Ezra the priest and scribe, and the Levites who were instructing the people said to them all, “This day is sacred to the LORD your God. Do not mourn or weep.” For all the people had been weeping as they listened to the words of the Law. Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This is sacred to the LORD your God.”

Just some background for a second. Nehemiah was a leader of God’s people during a time when they really needed encouragement and motivation to rebuild. Literally and spiritually. There was a lot of hard work involved, for sure. That’s why they were crying. They had been listening to the Scriptures being read and had realized just far off the mark they had gone.

But in this part of the story, Nehemiah’s got them all making plans for a serious party. Stop crying, he tells them. Go party.

Not surprising, since all through the Bible there are these kinds of celebrations described that have everything to do with worship.

And the reason these words seem so fitting is that it’s almost like that’s exactly what Ken and I have done for this trip. Made preparations for one big party of thanksgiving and joy.

Without question there is so much joy for me here. And to have Ken here this time, particularly this time to mark our 45th wedding anniversary, well, that just amps up the joy factor to the ‘nth’ degree. (A little math notation in his honour here.)

There’s the joy in the kids themselves, watching them interact, doing their chores early in the morning – and singing while they do so! Singing is part of the joy in both morning and evening worship time of course. When we’re reading together, and there’s a joke we all get in a book or in something someone said. And in the wild spontaneous hugs of the little ones.

So yes. These very brief two weeks are hands down full of joyful worship for us.

But Nehemiah isn’t done.

“Do not grieve,” he says, “for the joy of the LORD is your strength.” (v10)

The people have come through a lot of heartbreak and utter devastation to get to this place. The joy Nehemiah is reminding them of doesn’t come from the lack of hardship. Instead, joy here seems almost a defiant thing. It’s like he’s calling them to a higher level of joy. The kind of joy that would have them declare: We choose joy.

For the lesson I tied two butterflies (from the Dollar Tree in Midland ) on the ends of strings attached to bamboo poles. Ken and A-new (our male staff team member) dangled them just out of reach of Wan-Mai and Jua who, when chasing the butterflies could not catch them. But when they sat down with a friend, in this case Bee-Mai who eagerly volunteered, and May, who only needed to be asked, each of whom had a Bible in hand, and when they ‘pursued God’ together, the butterfly came and landed on their shoulder.

Forty-five years of marriage and the story of building a life together will quite expectedly have chapters of heartbreak and utter devastation. At least ours certainly does. There have been times when joy didn’t seem like it could ever be part of our picture.

But did we pursue joy for joy's sake, or God? I’d like to think we pursued God, of course I would. But who can really know? Looking back, I think we did make hard decisions together to love more than try to fix, extend grace more than judge, make eternal investments. And when times were wretched, hang on with white knuckles to the belief that God is good and knows what He’s doing.

We didn't do it perfectly, not at all. Who could claim such a thing? But little by little? Challenge by challenge? I do believe it’s been the collective life purpose of our marriage to pursue God together.

Whatever, all I know in these moments right now is that the joy thing is pretty party-ready strong here and now.

Today we expect a happy visit from Esther. Tomorrow, a trip to Doi Intanon. Our scheduled meeting for the Management Committee of New Family Foundation is Wednesday. The week looks full.

Keep you posted.

Meanwhile, I truly hope you are finding joy in whatever is before you this week!!!

The Perfect Not Perfect Bai Teo*

[*Thai phrase meaning ‘out for fun’ or ‘an outing’]

Our first concern is the weather forecast.  Can you even operate a Waterpark if there are thunderstorms forecast for basically the whole day?  Suradet and Yupa don’t seem concerned.  They are relying more on their ‘feel’ for how the sky looks than the weatherap.  Okay.  I’ve learned to trust their instincts, so we’re still on.

Next is the confusion about opening time and when we should leave.  Originally, we would have spent most of the morning in the water and ended up going out for lunch.  But a double check of the website and we’re now on for eating an early lunch here and spending the afternoon. 

I admit that already I’m feeling like this isn’t going at all how I imagined.  I’m glad, actually, for the morning to recoup from a jet-lag-hanging-on bad night’s sleep, and I end up getting in another hour after breakfast.  First naps, if you will.  But there’s a delay in the excitement build-up. 

Here I pause for a recap.  This is ‘the outing’ Ken and I have planned for while we are here.  And all the other plans had come together so nicely.  People had helped toward the costs of taking a family of 23 (by the time you include the adults) out for the day.  Even here in Thailand, that adds up.

 

We were also considering this something of our anniversary party.  The ‘event’ that would mark the astonishing connection between all that God has written into the story of our marriage, and the beautiful love-work of New Family Foundation.

Plus, there’s the kids themselves, eager to get going since an outing like this doesn’t happen very often at all. 

But eventually, we are off.  It’s just a short ride into Sankampeng, about 20 minutes, and enthusiasm is running high.  We arrive and step out to an intense sun – so much for the weather forecast – and make our way to line up.  A tad overwhelmed by the bigness of the entranceway, both Bee-Mai and Goon, come alongside to take my hand.  As we walk I realize I am having two intense responses.  One is this truly lovely Gramma moment.  And the other is a desperate hope that once inside we’ll be able to find some shade!!!

 

There’s a measuring board and we figure out our categories and organize ourselves accordingly.  Then wait a just a bit for our turn.

 

Okay no.  Only swimsuits are allowed, and none of us have one.  They’ll sell us one for 450 baht a piece (that’s $18 CDN x 23).  None of the information was on the website.  So, um.  Not in the budget and highly impractical given how often they’ll actually be used.  After a bit of conversation between the adults, and an explanation to the children, we decide this is not our destination after all.

 

It’s starting to feel like our day in unravelling a bit. 

I’m fairly used to ‘going with the flow’ while here in Thailand.  Lots of times thing don’t happen the way you think they will.  When I was here for three months, it once took an entre day to get a haircut.

But today is about the kids.  What now?  We’re all primed for an adventure, and it’s hot enough to really, really want to get wet.

 

Here we pause for another observation.  The kids are taking it in stride.  Yes, you can see the disappointment on their faces.  But there is not one single bit of whining, not one tear.  Nothing but a patient waiting for the adults to figure this out.

 

Which we do.  Or so we think.

 New plan (what’s this, plan D by now?).  We’ll head further into Chiang Mai and check out a place called The Grand Canyon.  Lots to do in the water there, apparently.   Pile everyone back in the vehicles and of we go for another 45 minute drive to the new place.

While we’re driving, it starts to rain.  Hard.  Ooookaaaay.

But when we arrive, the rain subsides and things look promising,  at first.  Entry fee is reasonable, especially considering anyone 8 and under gets in free.  That’s seven of us!  The ticket stubs are also good for discounts on drinks later, if we like.  Not sure about that yet, but we’ll see.

And in we go.

The place is massive.  A human-made Grand Canyon sort of deal that, we find out very soon, has activities more suited for young adults that children, zip line and cliff diving among them.  But over there, way down there, is an inflatable kiddie pool with a built-in slide.  And just a little further, complete with life jackets and other equipment, you can go kayaking, take out a paddle boat, or just jump in the water and float around on a tube.

None of it is as new and polished as the waterpark would have been.  The bamboo bridge between two sections is kinda rickety.  And standing on the one platform, you can’t mind that you’ll get your feet wet.  But it suits us in our wide range of ages just fine.  And, well, we can get wet.

Now, the little side note here is what’s also happening at the park that day.  A group party (later on a poster I’ll see it called a ‘day rave’) has booked the place, not exclusively, but they are playing loud boom-box music and, well partying in ways young adults party when it’s hot and there’s water.  All of them farangs (foreigners), non of them inhibited.   And that’s all I’ll say about that.  Except that I loved how confidently our group just went ahead and took their turns and got out in the boats and played on the floating platforms.  At least we had the entire kiddie pool to ourselves.  And who knows.  Maybe we had a tempering effect on the activities?

 

The water fun is only interrupted by appetites.  Bee-Mai comes to ask me “Gin cao?”  Can we eat now?  And we discover that the hostess to the restaurant on the premises is favourable to our work, the fact that we are a charitable foundation, and gives us a discount on all the food we end up eating, including the ice cream at the end.

Throughout the day, Ken and I mostly just watch.  You need several pairs of eyes on things when you have that many kids playing in the water.  But even more, it was just the deep and sweet satisfaction of seeing our kids making a memory.  I am especially conscious of a few of our newer kids whose stories are more difficult.  To see them abandon themselves to joy…..you just can put a price on that.

So was it a good day?

Absolutely.

Largely because we kept adjusting as we went, and kept our attitudes positive.  Yes.  That.  I need to keep remembering that.

But mostly because the kids really did have fun, and we made a pretty awesome memory together.

We cannot say enough how grateful we are for those who helped make this day happen.

 

 

It's Not the Heat, It's the Humility

 

When you tell folks you’re heading to Thailand in July, there’s often an initial response of concern about the weather here ‘this time of year’.

It’s hot, yes, I explain. But mostly I find that the fact that it’s summer in Canada too, and, like this summer, I’ve already experienced a fair bit of heat, the adjustment factor is not that significant.

More, it’s about the humidity.

Yes. And so right now, I’m hot and sweaty.

I guess it doesn’t help that we included a rousing bit of hop-around with the old favourite song “Your Everlasting Love” as part of our Fruit of the Spirit lesson on Love. For those who might not know, this song involves a full aerobic workout if you do it right. Side note: I’m always sure this will be the year they get tired of it, but no. It’s back by popular demand for every visit. And it’s always fun to watch the expressions on the new children who are bounding back and forth with God’s love being higher and deeper and reaching out to me, in a brand new way for them.

So much fun. And tonight, so much sweat.

Being here in sweaty July (believe me it’s worse in May, right Megan Ogilvie?) instead of drier, cooler November or February makes sense this year though. Our time here is meant to mark 45 years of marriage on August 19. And while our departure date is August 8, in an evet-oriented rather than a time-oriented culture, this is perfectly okay.

And pretty sticky.

But right here I need to come clean (and dry) and inform you that we are enjoying the not-luxury-but-survival air conditioning in our room. Even in November I’ll put it on at low for afternoon rest time. But now, in July, we have it running all night.

First night we tried to tough it out. Just used the room fan.
Nope. Not going to be okay, that.
Not if either of us wants to be of any use to anyone for any reason the next day.

My first few trips I felt differently about ‘indulging’ in such Western conveniences. Well, I guess at first, before we came alongside this work here, they didn’t have the resources themselves to install AC in a guest room. But even if they had, it seemed somehow counter intuitive to the ‘toughing it out missionary’ image I had in my mind ever since that ‘toughing it out missionary’ who came to my church when I was eleven described life here. Bugs, spicy food, snakes, unbearable heat, complex language. Who wants to come, he said. And I said, I do! I was elven, like I already said.

That was 55 years ago.
Believe me, my 66 year old body felt it after we did the song.
In the heat.
Also, I am apparently vain enough to notice how droopy I look in all the pictures. Just sayin.

Okay, here’s where I’m finally going to get to my point.

For what I do here, I need all the support I can get. From folks back in Canada, and – here’s the thing – from those I have come to serve. And that goes way further than just using the AC. It’s leaning into the back and forth humility of needing each other; the symbiotic nature of what it means to truly have reciprocity and balance and equality between us. And I don’t even think I’m touching the littlest bit of this here, explaining it properly using my survival need for AC in July, to really get to how this works.

Maybe I’m too hot, and my brain is just a little mushy. Jet lag is still a thing too actually.

So today we will play in the water.

A trip to the Waterpark in Sangkampeng is the plan for this happy, hot, sticky Saturday.
You can bet more pictures and videos will follow.
And we humbly thank those who made the extra contributions so we can do this.
I asked last night, and not one of our kids has ever been.
Here’s to new and cooler experiences!

And a few photo of flowers, because, they don't seem to look droopy in the heat.

Hope your Saturday is wild and comfortable and humbling,
and whatever you need it to be.

The Bigger Story in Every Book

 

They literally run to the guest house if they see the books are out. Somehow along the way of developing an English reading initiative here at Hot Springs, we’ve managed to achieved the happy goal of making reading fun.

I think the prizes may have helped.

Here’s how it goes.

Whenever myself or any team from Highview comes for a visit, we read with the kids. They receive one check mark for every book that either they read (if it’s at their level and we’re working on word identification, spelling and such) or that is read to them (when it’s more about just hearing the words and rhythm of English). There are 30 books to a card. Each card is numbered.

When all the check marks on the card are filled, that evening the child will be invited to choose from a selection of prizes. The prizes get a bit more exciting the more cards you fill. Stickers and small note pads, little bracelets and wrist bands for Card One. Lego and hard cover books with CD’s and snowmen by the time you get to Card Five. And so much more in between.

We’re only here for two weeks, so five cards are probably all we’ll get to. I think. I hope. But when you are able to read in groups, and that counts as a check mark for each person in the group, and when you have a lovely little library of English readers at various levels, each card can actually fill up quite quickly. This time there will be two readers, Ken and myself, so that will help.

I should take the time here to thank once again everyone who participated in our Book Gathering campaign through Usborne Books a few years ago now. And also anyone who’s donated any others to our cause. It has sometimes taken several different trips to bring them all here, due to weight restrictions on luggage, but with this trip I have now transported all of your gifts of love.

Today we got started.

The kids are off school, so we were able to set ourselves up just before lunch. And we read and read and read.

English is a core part of the school curriculum in Thailand. The government recognizes the advantage of not just individual citizens, but the entire country, to be able to communicate well with the rest of the world. Children who show proficiencies in English, and who can further their language skills throughout high school, are often favoured for the kinds of programs that lead to better vocational opportunity.

We know that not all of our kids will excel in English. But if we can give them some exposure and make it fun, they are that much further ahead.

And in any case, they think it’s fun, we have fun, and it’s an easy, relaxed way to build our relationships with them.

If any of our kids achieve the completion of Card Five that will mean 150 books were read. And each book with so many English words…

This morning was a very good start. Ken's little group was made up entirely of the newer children here, and at first they were not quite sure what they were supposed to do. But with all of Ken's sound effects and antics (Does anybody know Robert Munch's "Andrew's Loose Tooth?" Yeah, like that.) they got into it soon enough.



In my group, I think we still favour the "That's Not My..." series (Cow, Snowman, Polar Bear, Elephant) for it's repetition. The "What is Poo?" book always seems to make it into the pile somehow (pun not intended).

Book titles notwithstanding, it all counts.

The more of life I have to look back on, the more I realize how much it’s the collection of little things that really matter in the end.
If check marks on a chart can add up to some happy prizes, so can the simple act of reading be part of a much bigger story.

Photo note: The snowmen I brought with me were originally donated to one of our online fundraisers by one of our Sponsors (Betty Ann Howes) and have now made their way here. The kids are fascinated with snow and snowmen, so this will really provide some good motivation.)

So happy whatever day it is when you are reading this.
For Ken and I right now it's Friday and almost time for lunch.

Jet lag is not packing as much of a punch by now, but we're still planning on an afternoon nap, just sayin.