Hard Goodbyes

It certainly doesn't get any easier.

This is my sixth visit to Hot Springs. I wish the repetition could somehow make the saying of goodbye hurt less. But it doesn't. I think it hurts more, actually.

Our last day was long and hot and lazy. With a departing flight of 11:53 pm (delayed another 30 minutes after that) we had the luxury of a full day: all three meals, both morning and evening worship, and as much easy be-with as we could squeeze out of every minute.

The be-with wasn't too hard. Played Funky Monkey with Beeyung (who isn't a bad loser, but is also a rather exuberant winner;), admired Jom-Kwan's new dress (daughter of current staff couple), packed some more, and tried to get my heart around what I had prepared to teach at both morning and evening worship times.

Yup. It was the worship that started making it feel like the last day for me. Stupid song.

There's a sog we've sung in church not all that long ago.

Give thanks, with a greatful heart.
Give thanks to the Holy One.
Give thanks because He's given
Jesus Christ, His Son.

And now, let the weak say I am strong
Let the poor say I am rich
Because of what the Lord has done for us.

That song.

So I asked Suradet to teach me in Thai, and we've been singing at worship times. We did this morning. It's a hard song to sing here.

When I first heard my Thai friends singing it - a group of Asia's Hope Staff at Doisaket learning it for an upcoming retreat - I was struck with the beauty of hearing voices sing about strength and riches, when they clearly have so little.

But more recently I've been hit with one of those hammers of mercy, as God so often, and so beautifully and brutally does from time to time. Gently, boldly speaking into my soul.

Because really I'm the weak one. I'm the poor one. I have forgotten in my spirit how over resourced and under nourished my Western abundance driven soul is.

So, now, after having spent another immersion with these incredibly faithful people, let me the weak say that I've been strenthened. And let me the poor say I am rich for having been in their presence. And God's presence

Oh my.

And we're singing that yesterday. And, man! How hard it is to say goodbye.