Standing Sure in Precarious Times

Normally, around this time of the year, what I write about here is easier to read.  It's all about the kids and what special Christmas celebrations we're planning.  Usually I would have some updated pictures from my latest trip.  I'd be wrapping and delivering thank yous for our Sponsors brought back from the markets.  It would be all happy and encouraging and could even include a fun story about large bugs or language faux pas.

But there's a lot going on in the world right now.  Nothings' normal.

The pandemic and politics play into our newsfeeds in ways that seem very focused on Western concerns, or even all that's transpiring in Europe.  Yet on the other side of the planet, where ironically the virus has been kept under much better control, unrest and violence are not.

I'll make no attempt to explain the issues facing Thailand right now.  I do know that there are layers of cultural complexities and a long history of military rule in play.  It's not hard to find articles online if you're so inclined.  And I'll include one link here as a quick reference.

Protests in Thailand 

These are disturbing images.

I want to be quick to reassure you that our children at Hot Springs are far removed from the direct effects of anything that's going on on the streets of Bangkok.  Even should issues arise in Chiang Mai, our more remote location about 45 minutes away provide something of a protective buffer from the immediacy.

Still, the ripple effects of a country ill at ease do not bide well for the economy and overall stability.  Both the pandemic and the politics in Thailand are taking a toll on the tourist industry.  And all of it is taking its toll on the people.

It's important, I think, to understand the broader environment in which we at New Family Foundation are carrying out our mission to provide a loving home for at-risk and orphaned children in Northern Thailand to help them achieve their best potential in education, vocation and service to society.

Without any economic or political unrest, this is no small task.  But faced with a changing cultural landscape, with uncertain times ahead, what Suradet and Yupa, and our Staff, and all of you who support us are attempting is enormous.

So here's where I do want to say thank you to all our Supporters.  That you have remained faithful during a year when you have been dealing with your own anxieties and pressures is amazing!  Our gratitude for your ongoing love and care for our kids, even during a year when travel has been restricted and the fresh first hand reports from my physical presence there are missing, is beyond what I can properly express.

I will be sending along a Christmas report very soon.  There's a Christmas tree up at Hot Springs.  A little party is planned for December 25th,  Friday night, after the kids get home from school (no school holiday in Thailand for Christmas).  We've even done an actual card exchange where, back in October I collected cards from our Sponsors to go to our kids and...the kids did the same and now I have some fun envelopes to deliver this way!

But for now I felt it was important to make us just a little more aware of all that we're dealing with as we partner with our precious ones half a world away.

It's precarious, for sure.  AND we know we do not stand on the shifting sands of political unrest or global disease.  Psalm 27:13 provides a solid reminder.

I would have despaired unless I believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.

The Time Continuum

"My times are in Your hands."

Psalm 31:15

Same question from two different people in the same week.

"How will you manage your time and work load come November 15th when you step into the interim pastor role at Highview?"

Great question.

Some context before I get to any kind of response.

In May of 2018 I stepped away from the full time pastoral role in which I had been thoroughly immersed for the past twenty years, give or take.  The time was right by so many indicators, and it aligned perfectly with what was happening with our partnership in Thailand.

So for the past two years my full time attention has been given to being the Canadian Representative for New Family Foundation, overlapping this with a continued role at Highview as Missionary In Residence.  This has been plenty enough to keep anyone busy in a full time capacity, however you might count hours per week in all the comings and goings between homes.  I have been lovingly supported by several generous souls who believe in the mission and trust me enough to help carry the travel and living expenses required for international work.

In accepting Highview's invitation to serve as pastor during our Senior Pastor Erin's mat leave from November 15, 2020 to August 15, 2021, I am not putting the ministry in Thailand on hold.  Which leads to the very good question about how I'm thinking I'm going to pull this off.

The Reality of Travel Bans

First and most obviously, I'm not going to Thailand any time soon.  And I'll just say here, this breaks my heart.  Oh so much more I could write/have written/will write about that.  But for right now, in the pragmatics of things, let's just acknowledge the time and energy that is now available because of the travel bans.  

Every trip is a pretty big deal, truth be told.  If I'm going with a Team there's lots of preparation to get us there and back safely, plus all the arrangements while we're there.  Even if I'm going by myself, there's still sermons to prepare (some translated into Thai) and a month's worth of Bible and ESL lessons to get ready.  Getting there takes a full 24 hours or more, plus some recovery time once I arrive.  And then getting back takes another full 24 hours or more, plus even more recovery time on that end of things, as jet lag is definitely more of a thing coming back to Canada.  All that times two or three times a year.  It adds up.  

And this is time now freed up for other things.

The Wonders of Technological Connection

There are still important responsibilities to carry out as NFF's Canadian Representative.  Fundraising, oversight of operations, movement forward on the property development, connecting Sponsors and children, and encouraging our partners and staff all remain significant matters that occupy my time any given week.

For all of this, I am so grateful for the kind of communication technology that allows for video conferencing, translation of official documents, minutes and reports, and even the chance to occasionally lead in evening worship time and teaching with the kids.  

The Gift of Forward Planning

It was the end of July when I accepted the invitation to serve as interim pastor at Highview.  That gave me three and a half months to get ready.  Having spent most of February through June working on sermons and lessons for the next trip to Thailand (whenever that may be), I turned my focus to praying over and mapping out how Highview could enter a Christmas and winter season, and beyond, staying strong and connected.  

Gathering resources and writing sermons, laying out connection points for the holiday season, reaching out to folks to find out what they're thinking and how they're feeling, good hand off conversations with Pastor Erin, and attending a fair share of meetings in advance, have happily resulted in a working plan that will even out the work load for weeks to come.  It also enables me to stay out ahead on sermon prep, a fundamental element to keep the 'crunch work' of pastoral life to a minimum.

The Sheer Beauty of Team

Helen Keller said, "Alone we can do so little.  Together we can do so much."

No pastor does this on their own.  Highview has always operated within a mindset of a multitude of ministers all serving together according to giftedness, passion and season of life.  Some of our ministry teams have been put on hold due to Covid, but folks are eager to serve anyways, and we are forging innovative ways to reroute our energies in all the new ways of being church together that the pandemic has forced/allowed us to imagine.  

I am truly honoured to serve alongside such committed, competent people.  I know that I will be carried and supported by them just as I seek to carry and support them.  See how that works?

I'm not naïve.  I'm pretty sure I know what's required of me in these next nine months, and I know there are new things about pastoral work during a pandemic that I'm still getting my head around.  But I'm confident with all the contingencies in place that my time is indeed in the hands of a God who knows all things, and gives us strength in it all.

"Teach us to number our days,                                                      that we may gain a heart of wisdom."                                         Psalm 90:12

Since We're Talking About School

 

With October being a focus on raising funds for our University Students at New Family Foundation, I thought it appropriate to extend a hearty congratulations to Pastors Suradet and Yupa on their own recent academic success.

Both have received their Masters of Theology degree having completed the requirements of a long distance learning program out of Wesley University (Korean Methodist) in Jakarta, Indonesia.  This was a two year program requiring diligent study and the writing of several research papers, plus Hebrew language studies, all done remotely, except for a few strategic trips to Bangkok.  

Pictured here is a 'remote' graduation ceremony held in Thailand.  A full out graduation and presentation of their parchments won't happen until travel bans are lifted and they can be together with their class in Indonesia.

There are several remarkable things about this.

One is that Suradet and Yupa chose to fund these studies out of the frugal budgeting of the modest salary they receive from their small local church (where they serve as Pastors) and from New Family Foundation as Directors and Parents for our gathered family there.  Anyone who's been to market with Yupa, or has been there to observe the tedious care with which resources are stewarded won't find this impossible to imagine, just once again impressive to know.

The other is that they managed these studies in between their abundant life of ministry and service, AND the latter part all happened during Covid restrictions when the children were learning from home.  It takes a lot for either of them to admit that they're tired, so when I was asking them and they were saying so, I knew that it was taking a herculean effort to keep it all going.

But they did.  And they're finished.  And we are so grateful to have such tenacious, hard-working people leading the way by example for our family at Hot Springs.

Congratulations and well done!!!

Education in Thailand is not taken for granted.  There is no publicly-funded system at any learning level, beginning from kindergarten all the way to post secondary education.  Our Sponsors help to make sure our student from K to 12 can go to school, as part of their monthly contributions pay for school fees.  

When it comes to post secondary, we don't ask Sponsors to bear that weight, but participate in other fundraising efforts to put towards a separate fund so that all of our young people, if they want to, can continue their education and go as far as they want to go.

Hence our "NOT A GARAGE SALE" this year.

Normally we would have been gathering items all summer long, set them up in the parking lot in mid September, and have gathered the funds for the coming year.  With Covid making safety protocols difficult (especially not being able to bring things indoors if it rained), we opted with a grand experiment and brought the sale online.

If you're comfortable with online shopping, you'll find the 'store' easy to navigate.  I'd invite you to take a look at https://www.hcckw.ca/store/c2/Thailand_Fundraiser.html#/    We've got baked goods, masks, art, painted rocks and even a devotional (my own Pandemic Ponderings!) for you to choose from.

NOTE:  We are advertising Waterloo Region deliveries only, but if there's something (not food) that you want to consider, I'd be happy to negotiate something with you.

NOTE 2:  If anyone's curious I am STILL working on my Masters of Divinity from Tyndale with only three courses to go, one of which I am working on as we speak.  It's a preaching elective I've crafted and had approved called "What Then Shall We Say?  Preaching For Spiritual Formation During Disorienting Times".  Think it'll be relevant for the 9 month interim pastor role I'm filling at Highview this winter/spring?

Oh school!  I love it!!!

Please Don't Iron My Underwear

 

When we stay at Hot Springs our laundry is done for us.  This is part practical, part cultural and part instructional.   Even without the heart to serve built into every Thai soul, with twenty-five people and three machines going almost every single day, it's just way easier for our laundry to get included in the cycles.  And the children are required to do a lot of this themselves.  As a result, our laundry is usually returned to us, washed and sun-dried, and neatly folded.  If anything needed pressing, that's been done too. 

Every time I offer to help with hanging or gathering and folding.  Always I'm chased away back to my desk where I was working or even to my chair where I was reading.  Sometimes I'm sneaky and I get away with bringing in the laundry when no one's looking.

That's what I'm trying to do when Wara catches me this one day.

It's our underwear.   Just all nice and fresh and hanging there under the carport of the guest house.  And I have a minute so I go out to get it.  But Wara comes out from behind the hedge, stops in surprise, and with a cry of dismay runs over to persuade me to let her do it instead.

But I insist and we have a bit of a gentle tug of war.  And in the midst of it she asks me, But don't I want it all to be ironed?

I'm confused at first, wondering if I understood her - what's the word for ironing in Thai? But she's miming the back-and-forth of an iron on a board, so, no - yeah - that's what she means.

And a new thought dawns on me that hasn't really ocurred in the 11 years so far that I've been having my laundry done by others when I've been here.  They iron our underwear?  

My turn for a cry of dismay.

In my own journey and in the journey of our church to forge an honest, reciprocal relationship with our ministry partners in Thailand, it's been so important to continue to learn this dance of culture and roles and ways to love and be loved.  Dignity and respect and listening to and learning from, especially in the day to day of living in community is essential.

Liz Forkin Bohannan, founder of Sseko Designs, a socially conscious fashion brand creating education and economic opportunity for women across the globe, articulates it so well.

"I believe that we are called to live in community with others, across the street and across the globe.  Community where we do this sacred dance together through seasons of needing and being needed.  Giving and receiving.  Barely staying above water one minutes and being the lifesaver the next.  It's how humans are designed to exist together, pushing us al toward greater empathy and dignity and unity.  In any relationship, when we start to get confused and think these seasons and circumstances are permanent roles we are meant to play, we strip ourselves and others of the dignity of being a dynamic, complex fellow human who is both terribly broken and brilliantly bright."  From Beginner's Pluck (p97)

Love this!

But back to the underwear.

I convince Wara that, no, our underwear does NOT need ironing.  And she is over the top grateful.  "Oh Thank you Ahjahn Ruth!  You've given me some free time!"  And she hugs me and runs happily off to have some fun.  

I bring our underwear back to our room and tell the Team in disbelief.  They iron our underwear!!!  Everyone is astounded, and glad I have put matters straight.  Please.  Don't iron our underwear!

Later I feel it's important to communicate directly to the boss-lady Yupa.  I thank her profusely for all the ways we are taken care of when we visit.  But I insist that this task of ironing our underwear be stopped.  She seems confused.  This happens often enough as both of us are learning each other's language.  But when we clarify and Yupa understands what I'm saying, she tells me.  "But Ahjahn Ruth.  We don't iron your underwear."

What?  A little more back and forth and we realize.  Wara was playing a joke!!!  We laugh a lot about this.

I love this story because it speaks to the life and mischief and joy and heart of this young lady who is currently in her first year of Bible School in Bangkok.  She's one of our 'university' students (In Thai the term 'university' is used for all secondary education) and she's truly a delight worth investing in.

When she's not pulling one over on Ahjahn Ruth, she's excelling in school, particularly linguistics, or creating beautiful things out of paper, or helping her young siblings with homework, and, of course pitching in with the domestics required to raise a family of twenty-five.  She's smart and spirited and kind.  Wherever she's headed with her studies, she's going to be amazing.  

I personally think she'd make a great pastor.

During the month of October we are raising funds to send Wara and also Boy (our other Bible school student) along in their educational journey.  

Check it out at https://www.hcckw.ca/store/c2/Thailand_Fundraiser.html#/

(No underwear was harmed during the writing of this post.)

Time and Sorrow and the Laying Down of Heads

Remembering today the tragic and sudden loss of Bee, son of Suradet and Yupa, and big brother to Bell, struck by a truck while on his motorcycle on the way home from school, August 31, 2016.

===========================

It was four years ago, but the images are vivid.  

The first wretched phone call.  The disorientation of deciding to go.  The extra-long, and appropriately turbulent plane ride.  Arriving to a monstrous grief, and the strangeness of eastern death rituals.  Surreal on so many levels.

Bee was dead.  And it didn't matter that we didn't believe this could be true; it was.  Beloved son of Suradet and Yupa, just 20, did not survive the collision between a tractor-trailer rig and the motorcycle he was driving.

A Thai funeral lasts all week.  Bee was lying in the covered yard of his grandparents, a decision made purposely so, even in the rawness, the folks immediately available in that village would have the chance to see how followers of Jesus grieved.  Even in their grief, thinking of others always.  

About forty people stayed together in the house, most of whom were from the mountain, Suradet's side of the family.  His parents, sisters, spouses, children, and some friends who had come along. There was visitation every day.  The village women made the food.  Mostly sticky rice and dishes of varying spice-intensities in which to dip and scoop with the sticky rice.  I didn't use anything but my hands for eating the entire week.  Every night there was a service; music and a message, as a gift from other churches nearby.  I spoke at one of them.  I still have the notes, which is good, because otherwise I wouldn't know what I said.  

It was hot.

At first I was given a room to myself upstairs, complete with mosquito netting around the bed.  But it soon became impossible for this farang to be there, and I moved down to sleep, mat-to-mat, with the rest of the family.

In between the visitation and the food and the service and the sleeping we did nothing.  And quite literally nothing.  Sitting in silence, inside away from the sun, a fan blowing.  All of us, just around the walls of the room, or lying down on mats.  I wasn't sure, but it seemed this was part of what we were supposed to do.  Just sit and be in the midst of the loss.  

Suradet's mother and I had met before.  I'd been up to the village and we'd formed a tentative connection made more delicate because of the lack of language (my stumbling Thai wasn't all that helpful in a Karen village), and by her later-confessed utter intimidation in having this farang woman in her home.  That last part is complicated, and may seem ridiculous, except when you understand the layers of it, some of which date back many centuries to an old, old story told by the Karen in which the 'white brother' (or sister) is the long awaited hero.  

Sitting numb and silent against the wall together, however, we were simply two women trying to get our heads around the excruciating loss of a grandson.  

It was a bit of a cultural risk, what I did that one afternoon.  A calculated cultural risk, in that my understanding of the importance of the head in Thai culture, and having had women of the church come lay their heads down on my lap when my own mother died (while I was in Thailand).  And actually, now that I'm describing it as a risk, I don't think I really gave it too much thought.  It just seemed a way to communicate our shared pain.

I laid my head down on her lap.

She didn't seem surprised.  And quite naturally started to stroke back my hair, which was comforting. And I lay there like that for some time.  No words.  The language thing didn't matter in that moment.

That was four years ago.  And the image is vivid.

======================

Time and grief are not particularly good friends,                                                                                         I don't think.  

And I'm not at all sure that time does indeed heal all wounds.                                                                  Rather, time is a trickster, compressing and drawing out at the same of it,                                           until there is no telling what the year,                                                                                                       or what the hell.

A fine boy-almost-man,                                                                                                                      vibrant,                                                                                                                                                          persistent,                                                                                                                                                      fun,                                                                                                                                                           eats so much that you wonder how he stays so lean.                                                                      Talented musician,                                                                                                                              enjoying his studies,                                                                                                                                    loving life.

Then gone.

The force of it throws us hard against the wall,                                                                                            then,                                                                                                                                                          and now,                                                                                                                                                    the same. 

Beautiful son.

==================

I am so impressed with the tenacity of both Suradet and Yupa, little sister Bell, and Bee's grandparents all, in their relentless pursuit of authentic grieving and faithful ministry throughout this part of their story.

 

Not There

What does a missionary to Thailand do with herself if she can’t go to Thailand?

 Great question.

 Covid-19 has disrupted and disoriented lives all around the world.  Travel, particularly international travel, was among the first components of life to shut down.  Likely it will be one of the last to reopen, at least to the kind of ‘non-essential’ travel as visits to Hot Springs would be classified.  As well, there is the quarantine periods to consider.  Fourteen days on either side of a month-long visit drastically reduces any meaningful contribution, and imposes significant stress on both families, coming and going.

 So yes, I am “stuck” and “safe” in Canada for the foreseeable future.

 But I am not wasting this!

 Whatever else Covid-19 has imposed upon our lives – and with great sorrow and respect for those who have suffered and have lost loved ones – there is a way of approaching this unusual time with an eye for the opportunities.  And I see so many opportunities when it comes to the work of New Family Foundation!!

Opportunity to move forward with Property Development

We now have enough funds to begin building the road.  Covid-19 lockdown in Thailand, then the rainy season has stalled us from getting a good start on this for now.   In the meantime, there is still the larger project to consider and fundraising ventures to pursue.  Anyone who’s been involved in fundraising large projects such as this knows it takes time!  I am grateful for the extra time to read, connect, learn and experiment.  There is still a good vision ahead of us for providing the appropriate space for our kids.

Opportunity to stay connected.

Without a visit this summer, we were able to gather pictures and greetings from the Children’s Sponsors to send digitally.  This was an important connection, and something we hope to do every so often between the Children and their Sponsors, as long as in person visits are not possible.  Also, staying connected relationally with Suradet and Yupa and the children is happily possible through Facebook video chats.    Ken and I have even participated not just in the official Management Committee meetings required by both governments, but also in evening times of worship. 

Opportunity to prepare for next visit.

The preparation work for sermons and Bible lessons taught while there is significant.  While no date is set for a next visit, I can and am still working on the writing and research and gathering of materials.  A series in the book of Acts is on tap, and it’s been good to have extra time to make the lessons, in particular, engaging and fun. 

Opportunity for general ‘housekeeping’.

During the busy times of preparing for, traveling to, and returning from Thailand, the necessary tasks of overseeing a Foundation can get put in the ‘to do another time’ pile.  This is that other time.  Keeping records up to date, even purging and filing pictures for future use, is all part of the work, and I am grateful for the space to make sure things are all in good order.

Opportunity to support my supporting church.

As you know, Highview Community Church in Kitchener provides the “umbrella” for New Family Foundation and the means by which all donations, Sponsorships, and other important connections can function with accountability.  As Missionary In Residence, it is already part of my job description to serve in any way that’s reasonable, including being part of the preaching team.  During this period of time, another more concentrated way to support Highview has presented itself.  Our Senior Pastor, Erin Wildsmith and her husband Dave are expecting their third child in November.  Highview has asked if I would provide ministry oversight during the nine months of her mat leave.  There are several reasons I am delighted to serve Highview in this way.  One of them is in support of a church that acknowledges female leadership, particularly when it requires providing her with time to enjoy her baby and bond as a family.  This is still new in many church cultures, and I am happy to come alongside Highview as we continue to forge new paths for our congregation in the future.  The mat leave is from November 15, 2020 to August 15, 2021.   I will be retaining 15 hours per week to put towards all that is required to keep New Family Foundation and our children safe and well.

Opportunity for language study.

In between visits it is essential that I stay on top of the constant work of learning Thai.  This is best done in small daily doses, with weekly reinforcements.   Listening to Thai worship music, writing out Scripture from my Thai Bible, rewriting my rather messy notes in my Thai song book, and work through online lessons helps.  Nothing substitutes, however, for the immersion experience, and I am very conscious of what I’m missing by not being there.  All prayers for my cognitive functions are greatly appreciated :).

Opportunity to write.

Prompted by my own reflections during this long time of global weirdness, I have found some therapy in writing.  To my surprise, others seem to have found some of my words helpful, and have encouraged me to give some attention and time to making them more widely available.  I do not know what might come of such a venture, but….stay tuned for what might develop out of these initial ideas.  Anything that emerges will be put towards fund raising. 

Thank you.

Your ongoing faithfulness during this difficult time has been so encouraging and inspiring to me personally, and also to Suradet and Yupa, who cannot express their gratitude enough.  We are confident that God is moving us forward.  Your contribution keeps us headed in a good direction, no matter what the future holds.

One more thing.  We have a new grandson!  Timothy Christian was born Sunday, August 2, weighing in at 7 lbs 8 oz.  He is a blessing and a joy, and certainly provides me with no end of opportunity.  Leaving a legacy for children.  Can’t think of a better thing to do with ‘all this time’.

 Blessings and peace.

Stay safe and well.

 

 

Keeping It Together When You're So Far Apart

"Not for the foreseeable future."

That was the way long time missionary Mike Flinchum put it in his newsletter to supporters, reporting on the cancellation of his three month stay in Thailand that had been planned for later this year.  For many good reasons, I am following his more experienced lead, and the guidance of my family and Highview's leaders, in deciding on my next visit.

Bottom line:  It won't be for quite some time.

Last year at this time I was there.  With Norma and Sheldon and Becca and Esther.  Over the past two years I've visited no less than five times with various other team members, or on my own.  Five times within twelve months!  And now.....

As an update, Thailand is actually doing very, very well in all things Covid, as I've previously reported.  As of this date they are holding on to their incredibly low number of Covid-related deaths; 58.  Quite impressive when you consider the population is over 70 million.  

Canada, while on a good trajectory for the moment, certainly can't claim such a clean record.  Thailand's borders are closed to all international travelers, and for good reason.  And risks for travel outside our own cities even, let alone an international airport, are still significant enough that no one is suggesting it's time I pack my bags any time soon.

Pause for a big and serious sigh.  

Because.

However.

The wonders of the internet make some things possible, and I welcome those connections now with more wonder and gratitude than ever before.

Organizationally, legally, this is so important.  The nitty gritties between Highview Community Church and New Family Foundation require something called 'reasonable oversight'.  It's the kind of careful connection both governments expect in order to maintain good accountability and keep our charitable status on both sides.  Normally this is done by the frequency of visits and the meetings of the Management Committee that happen in person while I'm there.  Right now, well, it's the marvel of the long distance, virtual meeting that we're all getting more and more used to that's making a degree of that possible.  Agendas, minutes ,reports, decisions...all done together.

Relationally, emotionally, this is even more important.  As we've said all along, this is so far past being anything even remotely resembling a 'project' and is a true partnership in every sense of the word.  Family.  What this means is that we are apart as family right now.  Far apart.

Except.  

It's possible, apparently, to still participate in a time of simple worship.  What a gift to this over-stretched heart.

And.

I'm strengthened somewhat by the realization the other day in a Facebook messenger conversation, when I was joking around about something personal, something you'd only dare joke about with someone you were close with.   And I was suddenly and quietly deeply glad that there'd been enough language learning, and enough cultural immersion, and enough trust built over these past twelve years for that to even happen.  

The kids are doing well, back at school and adjusting to Covid restrictions required to keep them safe.  Suradet and Yupa are troopers, settling into new routines to adapt to what it means to keep the kids safe and also make sure they get their education.

Life goes on and the goats have babies and the garden grows and the rainy season begins and they all have long lazy naps on Sunday afternoons because the rain sort of does that to you.

There's been some small but good progress on the new property project, but even that is put on hold now, somewhat because of Covid and mostly because of the rains.

Photo Credit:  Foon Narin